Nothing gold can stay
by Deirdanna Black
Summary: Here's an other version of how Lily and James got together. What would have happened if Sirius hadn't been the only Mudblood lover from his family in Hogwarts. JamesLily, SiriusOC, RemusOC.
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: I'm not J.K. Rowling... What a surprise! Well anyway nothing's mine expect for a few OCs and my own fantasms.

* * *

**Prologue**

I got my letter on a hot night of June. I was going to be a student at Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry from September. This letter had been expected as my family was one of the biggest families in the wizard community. I was then eleven and I had grown apart from my family since the day I had understood that for them, purity of blood was much more important than merits or achievements. A few days later I heard that my cousin Bellatrix, jewel of the family, was going to be one of my fellow classmates. My mother decided she would be of a good influence on me and demanded that I would stay with her. It sounded like a nightmare. I didn't want to go. The only advantage was the fact that I was going to be far from home for a long time. But I would be a Slytherin as my whole family had been before me and I dreaded that. All that pureblood nonsense. Wizards and witches from muggle families were often more talented than the others perhaps because of the inbreeding our families had imposed for generations. I knew my parents had arranged my marriage soon after my birth but I didn't know who I was supposed to marry. Certainly one of my cousins. Regulus maybe.

I spent the rest of the summer wandering about and on the first of September a car picked me up in front of my house. In the back of the car sat Bellatrix. She stared at me for the whole journey and when we arrived at the station she told her house elf to take her trunk and left me with mine. After a while as my trunk was quite heavy I managed to get a trolley and I got to the 9 ¾ platform.  
As I was going through the mass of students chatting on the platform, something drew my attention. In front of me was a girl my age with the hair I had always wanted to have. Red, straight, long hair. She was trying to get onto the train with great difficulties. As we were now allowed to use magic, I took out my wand and used it to make the trunk levitate. She was so surprised she fell over. A boy behind her helped her get up, and stood there his mouth hanging open. She thanked him and turned to me.

- How does that work?

It seemed as she was looking for the ropes that were certainly maintaining the trunk in the air.

- Huh… It's basic Charms. You'll learn it this year probably.

- Ah? Great! Thanks! And thanks for the trunk. By the way my name is Lily, Lily Evans.

- Hi. I'm Deirdre.

- And don't you have a surname?

I had dreaded this moment. When she would know I was part of the noble family of the Black she would immediately turn away. But I couldn't lie, could I?

- … Black… My name's Deirdre Black.

- You seemed to hesitate.

- Well no… It's just that I… well. Never mind. Shall we look for an empty compartment?

- Yes sure.

I was startled. Instead of the smirk I had supposed to see she was still looking at me with this same kind smile. I could not believe it. Didn't she know it wasn't good for her to be a friend of mine? In the first compartment, we found a group of seven years. Intimidated we backed off. The few next ones were full except for the one in which Bellatrix, her sister Narcissa, the youngest Macnair and the youngest Lestrange were sat. Lily made a move towards the door but I was extending a hand to stop her, another hand landed on her shoulder. Lucius.

- Where do you think you are going mudblood?

- Don't call her that.

- Oh Deirdre. I hadn't seen you. Come in, you're family.

- I don't think I am from now on, Lucius. Let go of her now.

He looked at me, an expression of pure surprise on his face.

- You are telling me you prefer to put the shame on all your family? You do know mudbloods are…

- Shut up. I told you not to call her that I think Lucius. I am not part of this family anymore. Goodbye Lucius.

Lucius, startled, entered the compartment. As Bellatrix was glaring at me I heard Lestrange say: "Well that's the second one today. Is it something in the air?" I had to explain it all to Lily from the meaning of mudblood to the belief of the Black family and all their cousins in the superiority of blood. She was startled. We had been chatting for a few minutes when someone knocked at the door. Two girls went in and asked whether they could sit with us or not.

- Of course you can. My name's Lily.

- And mine is Deirdre.

- I'm Alice and that's Siobhan.

oooooooooOoooooooooOoooooooooOoooooooooOoooooooooOoooooooooOoooooooooOoooooooooOoooooooooOoooooooooOoooooooooOoooooooooOooooooooo

We chatted the whole journey and I was amazed to see that people like those could actually like me even if I was a member of the Black family.

When after a long and wet crossover of Hogwarts Lake we arrived at the castle I suddenly remembered why I could feel a whole pack of butterflies in my stomach. The Sorting Ceremony. I was going to be a Slytherin and a member of the family for seven more years. The deputy Head-Mistress, Professor McGonagall, began to call out the names. When she arrived at B, my blood froze in my veins. And then…

- Black, Bellatrix.

Bella went graciously to the front of the room and placed the Sorting Hat on her head. Two seconds later we heard the Hat's cry:

- Slytherin!

The Slytherin's table was the only one I could hear applause from.

- Black, Deirdre.

I had to go. I placed the hat on my head and listen to what it said.

- Well my dear, you have an awful lot of qualities. I may say that the Sorting has never been a hereditary question. Your biggest quality is your courage. I will then send you to …

Gryffindor!

I could not believe it. And apparently I was not the only one. Even McGonagall had her eyebrows raised. I was heading to the Gryffindor table a smile suddenly appearing on my lips when I heard McGonagall say:

- Black,

Another one?

- Sirius.

I turned back to see a quite tall and handsome long-haired boy. Sirius?

- Gryffindor!

oooooooooOoooooooooOoooooooooOoooooooooOoooooooooOoooooooooOoooooooooOoooooooooOoooooooooOoooooooooOoooooooooOoooooooooOooooooooo

So we were going to be two. The two mudblood lovers as we would later be called by our family. Lily, Alice and Siobhan were sent to Gryffindor too and we became best friends. Sirius met three boys, one of which was the boy who had helped Lily get up in the train. He would never forget the sensation he had had with my friend in his arms. He fell madly in love with her and developed a very embarrassing arrogant attitude towards her. He would ask her out every day and she would always say no, thinking it was a dare. This boy was named James Potter. Another of Sirius' friends was called Peter Pettigrew. He was a little chubby boy who wouldn't do anything by himself. He would always follow the others. He was much less clever than his friends and from the beginning I couldn't help but dislike him. The last of the four boys was Remus Lupin, the one I was in love with. He had sandy hair and blue eyes, was taller than me and was a werewolf. Now, I wasn't supposed to know the last thing. I had discovered it during my second year. Well he was always sick during the full moon and I could put two and two together. I also knew that in second year he had finally told it to the other Marauders, which was the name of the group he formed with Sirius, Peter and James.  
Remus was very clever and even if I was sure he helped the other three in planning their pranks sometimes he was much more reasonable than they were. Unfortunately he didn't consider me for anything but a friend.

* * *

Hello everyone! Well now if anyone can manage to write a few words so that I can know what you think about this story it would be great...

Deir


	2. Chapter 1

Hello! Well here's the first chapter.

* * *

**Chapter 1**

The sun was shining as Deirdre arrived at King's Cross Station. Her seventh and last year at Hogwarts was soon to begin and she was glad to see her friends again. In the distance she suddenly saw something she recognized. Lily's hair. She shouted the girl's name and ran towards her. Lily didn't hear her and climbed onto the train. In the distance Deirdre could see her friend muttering things to herself. Lily had probably already fought with James Potter she thought. She knew her friend couldn't stand the boy half because he was arrogant, half because she thought he was laughing at her when asking her out all the time like that. James, true, was arrogant. He was the Seeker in the Gryffindor Quidditch Team and every time Lily would be here, he would show off, passing a hand in his hair to try to make it messier than it already was which wasn't possible or making crazy things on his broom. Lily would just look elsewhere and the poor boy was getting more and more desperate. Every time he would ask her out she would say the same thing "Not in a million years Potter". But after five years he still asked all the time.

In the fifth year Lily and Remus had been named the Gryffindor Prefects. And Deirdre knew that her friend was now the Head Girl. What she didn't know though was who had been named Head Boy. She could not help but wish it wasn't going to be Remus. The Head Boy and Head Girl had their own dormitory which was really more like a little apartment, quite far from Gryffindor tower. They would live together for the whole year. And Deirdre had to admit that she could not stand the idea of the boy she loved living far from her with an other girl even if that other girl was one of her best friends. But it was very likely it would be him. After all he had been a good prefect for the past two years and he was probably the only one who could moderate if not stop the Marauders. And he was quiet, and intelligent, and handsome. God he was handsome. Deirdre was happy he had never discovered she was in love with him and knew him to be a werewolf.

She got onto the train and looked for her friends. She arrived in front of the usual compartment. Inside three girls were sat. Lily was rambling through her books as Alice and Siobhan were simply chatting together. Alice was a tall, blond girl who liked to laugh and chat with her friends even during the classes which wasn't a real problem as Lily, Siobhan and she had always had very good marks. As for Deirdre she was believed to be the brightest student Hogwarts had ever had. She knew everything by heart and could perform almost every spell jinx and curse that existed.

As she got nearer the girls she heard Alice talking about her summer holidays.

* * *

- He was so nice! And handsome! I miss him so much already.

- Who are you talking about Ali? New boyfriend?

- Deir! Hello!

- How are you Deir?

- I'm fine. Calm down now. Ali would let go of me please?

- Oh yeah sorry.

- Hi Lil'.

- Huh? Oh Deirdre! Hi! How are you?

- I'm fine and you? So do you know who the Head Boy is?

- Nope, I don't. I hope it's Remus though.

- Hmm.

- No I really hope it is! I'd like to spend an entire year with that guy.

- I bet you would! Said Alice.

- Now you know that's not what I meant.

- Unfortunately yeah I do. But Lily, honestly, doesn't he completely meet your standards? I mean he's handsome and you guys really like each other...

Okay that was it. I could barely stand it when Lily prayed for Remus to be the Head Boy but hearing Alice trying to put him and Lily together was too much for me. So in the middle of Alice's sentence, I snapped:

- Lily! Aren't you supposed to be in the prefect compartment by now?

- Oh God Deir you're right!

She rushed to put her things in her bag and ran out of the compartment while Alice smiled at her. When she had left Alice turned to me.

- Hey, Deir are you all right? You first turned very red in the face but now you're white as a sheet!

At that moment Siobhan stirred. She had been half sleeping since Alice had begun to tell her about her holiday but still she had quite followed the chat between Alice and Lily. I had seen her looking at me all the time.

Siobhan must have been the weirdest of us all. When she was amongst others, even fellow Gryffindors, she was awfully shy. She would not speak unless she was talked to, she kept her head lowered and she always tried to get away as soon as possible. What's more she liked Sirius a lot so when he was in the same room, often accompanied by whoever was his girlfriend this week, she just would not utter one single word. It had been like that since our first day at school when Sirius sat down next to her at the Gryffindor table and literally bed her good day, smiling. I doubted anyone had noticed that as Lily has been too busy with Potter while Alice was always looking for a new boyfriend for when she would have left the one she was going out with. Alice was a very tall beautiful blond girl and all the guys in Hogwarts wanted to go out with her. The longest time ever she had spent with the same boy must had to be no more than a week. She had even gone out with Sirius much to the displeasure of Siobhan. But Siobhan didn't blame Alice for that I was sure. She was just quieter for the few days the relationship went on. By then I had been very sorry for her but I hadn't said anything thinking she wouldn't like everyone to know she was in love with Sirius. But looking at her now I was wishing I had. She was looking like someone who was going to say something I would not like.

The thing is, when Siobhan was alone with us, she was completely different. In fact as Lily used to say, she was the most outgoing person we had ever seen. She would be the one who would start all the pillow fights, she would often put ice cubes in Alice's pyjamas when our friend didn't want to get up but the most surprising thing would be when she would start singing. She had the most wonderful voice ever. When it would be the four of us alone in our dormitory she would sing all the time. After a while our comrades in the next dormitories who had heard her asked us where that heavenly music was coming from. We would not tell them as Siobhan had ordered us not to and they certainly could not think it could be her having rarely heard her voice before. They went on asking for a while but finally stopped when they saw they would not get any answers. We tried to convince Siobhan she had to sing in front of an audience but she would not listen to us.

For now as only the three of us were in the compartment, she was her normal self. She opened her eyes, looked at me, smiled wickedly and began to say what I dreaded most:

- Well, that's just because she's in love with...

But thanks God before she could finish her sentence, three boys entered the compartment.

- Who's in love with whom? Asked Sirius.

As soon as she had heard Sirius' voice she had closed her mouth and eyes and was now trying to look soundly asleep.

- O'Connor what are you doing? I heard your voice for was must be the second time in seven years so obviously you're not sleeping.

Alice looked at him oddly. Then she turned to look at Peter and Remus who had entered behind Sirius. She observed them for a moment before turning to stare at my still white face. She looked at me for a few seconds then she looked at Remus and turned back to me to see me blushing and looking at her. She stared and finally smiled and winked at me. I was completely taken aback. She had figured it out! I let myself fall abruptly on my seat and sighed loudly. Remus turned to look at me and when he saw that I was once again white, hurried to sit next to me, took my hand in his and murmured:  
- Are you okay Deir love?

I nearly fainted. When had he begun to call me by my nickname? And what about "love"? I looked at him with wild eyes. I tried to say something but I was so bewildered that I looked pretty much like Siobhan when Sirius would talk to her. Me! Me, who had always been comfortable around boys! I finally just nodded to reassure him. He smiled but didn't let go of my hand. And that sent butterflies to my stomach. Then Sirius spoke again. He was only a few centimetres away from Siobhan's face and he was waving his hand in front of her closed eyes as if she could see it.  
- Hey O'Connor! You're not sleeping and we both know it so now be a good girl and open your eyes!

- Maybe she's playing the sleeping beauty, Siri. Said Peter

Sirius looked at Peter and then turned to Siobhan

- is that what you're playing at? Let's play then.

Siobhan distinctively shivered but didn't dare open her eyes, knowing Sirius' would be the first thing she would see. Alice and I exchanged a look wondering if he was really going to kiss her. To our utter amazement he leaned in and kissed her slightly. Her eyes shot open.

- See? That's what I had told you.

But Sirius had locked his eyes with Siobhan's and did not answer.

- I bet Susan is not going to like that.. Stated Remus.

Peter laughed his agreement. Sirius didn't hear again. I looked at Siobhan's first smile in public and turned to Remus to ask who Susan was. It was Peter who answered.

- Oh Susan! Susan's been Sirius' new bird for the past well... hour. He said glancing at his watch.

I immediately regretted asking the question. Alice looked at Sirius with wild eyes. Sirius who hadn't followed the conversation at all frowned when he saw the most beautiful smile he had ever seen fade away. Siobhan seemed to be really chocked. No one moved for a few seconds as Alice and I were horrified, the boys didn't understand anything obviously thinking it was a normal situation. I could see Siobhan's hopes disappearing.  
She got up and ran out of the compartment leaving a bewildered Sirius.

- What got into her? He asked.

That was too much. I stood up letting go of Remus' hand and I held Sirius by his shirt while Alice was hitting his head repeatedly while grinding her teeth.

- Did you even realise what you've just done to her?

I tried to contact Siobhan using Legimens but she had closed her mind. We had been using Legimens to talk for years even if Alice and Lily still had some problems using it.

I had learn it when I was very young without really trying. I had understood by the time I had been nine that it was not a normal thing to do when I had tried to speak to one of the few muggle friends I had. In fact because my mother had discovered I had muggles for friends she had forbidden me from going out of the house and not wanting my friend to wait for me in the rain I sent her a simple message to tell her I wouldn't be able to come. It was when I sensed her panicking that I discovered I wasn't doing something normal.

I hadn't anyone to ask about it so I waited until my cousin Andromeda went to my house for Christmas. Andromeda was the only person I liked in my family. She was normally never invited but that Christmas was special: we were going to celebrate the 50th birthday of my wonderful father. All the family had been invited and so I was able to see Andromeda for the first time in more than 4 years. When she came into the living room, everybody went silent for a minute or two. Then they stopped looking at her and resumed their conversations. She didn't seem to be surprised but I could see she was thinking she should have given an excuse not to come. In her mind, I saw the image of a tall brown-haired man. She immediately sensed me.

- Hi Deir it's been a long time.

- Hi Andromeda. How are you?

- Oh God you're still so formal. Ask your question and if you want me to answer please call me Meade.

- Okay Meade then.

I then told her the whole story. When I finished even though she was very far from me, I saw her staring at me with tears in her eyes.

- My poor child… Your mother didn't teach you anything, did she?

- What do you mean?

- I had always thought your mother had taught you Legimens and Occlumency. And when I saw your last time, I was surprised to see that you could not only manage Legimens but also Telephilius.  
So well it's just that… You were five. I could not believe you had been able to learn that at your age so I would never even have thought you could have learnt it by yourself! An-

- Wait! Meade wait! What is the difference between Legimens and the other Tele-thing?

- Wait…. You… You mean you don't know what Telephilius is? You have said it haven't you? I mean when I entered the room you have discreetly pointed your wand at me and pronounced the spell haven't you?  
- Meade calm down. I don't know what you're talking about. The thing is I hadn't many things to do here when I was very young so I used to read a lot. And well I was reading Father's and Mother's old schoolbooks and I was just trying to reproduce what was depicted there… And once I found a note on the Legimens page saying the Black family had always been gifted with the ability of communicating without talking. So one night as Mother and Father were asleep I borrowed Father's wand and tried it. It was a bit disturbing the first time because I could not say which image was in which head and I could see images coming from a neighbour that were really freaky. But after a while I managed to have a better control. But I did that using Legimens not Telephilius.

- But, but… wait that doesn't explain why you don't use a wand!

- Meade I know I owe you respect because you're older but I'm beginning to wonder how you can have been called the brightest student in Hogwarts…

- Ha I'm not offended at all when you're the one who says that. Deir you are already at least as bright as I am if not brighter and you're not ten yet. But never mind, what did you man just now?

- Well as you've just said I'm nine…

- And so?

- So? Nine, wand, illegal, Hogwarts, eleven?

- Ha…. Yeah…. But I saw you using charms when you were five! You can't deny that?

- I'm not denying anything… I'm just saying I've rarely used a wand. When you don't have your own it's not very handy . So as for mother affection, I learnt to do without it. I just use my mind. Still I want to know what the difference is between Telephilius and Legimens.

- …

- Meade?

- …

- Meade? Can you hear me?

- Huh sure Deir. Well huh the difference is the fact that to use Legimens you have to keep eye contact with the person you're communicating with. Using Telephilius you don't need to. But Telephilius is something most adults never even achieve after years and years of work… Like… I don't know…Patrons charms…

- Oh. Mine's a white wolf.

- Mine's a dove. I like it so much when they…wait…you mean you actually have….

- I produced my first Patronus when I was seven. Took me quite a time to produce it without Father's wand. Well anyway thanks for answering my question. I have to go to bed now.

-… okay then…see you soon I hope…Can you write me a letter explaining how you can do magic without a wand?

- I'll try. Good bye Meade. Oh and Andromeda by the way say hi for me to your fiancé, that handsome looking muggle fellow of yours.

- I will and I told you not to call me An-…What? How do you…?

- I just said to say hi to Mr Tonks for me. And I hope your mother won't kill you. Bye Meade.

- …Bye…

After that conversation with Andromeda, I had understood I was not exactly a normal child. I decided not to say anything to my parents and to continue studying. My mother didn't allow me to send that owl to Andromeda and I never saw her again. Just before I went to Hogwarts , I learnt that she had married a muggle named Ted Tonks and wasn't consequently part of the black family anymore. When I asked Sirius he told me to write to her with an Hogwarts owl and that she would be very pleased to hear from me again. That's what I had done, and I was now sending her an owl a week.

When I arrived in Hogwarts, I noticed that No one was able to talk without speaking as I was. I tried with Sirius, thinking that maybe as he was a Black… But when I tried to speak to him I discovered he had a huge wall in his mind that was blocking me from seeing anything. I tried to break through but to my astonishment I wasn't successful. I asked him where he had learnt that but he asked me what I was talking about. He seemed to do that unconsciously.

Thinking it was a good way to keep talking even during the classes, I had tried to teach it to my three friends. It took Lily and Alice three years to be able to mentally contact me when I wasn't in the same room and they h to concentrate a lot and, of course, to use their wands. As for Siobhan, she had immediately understood and even if she still needed her wand most of the time she could now communicate with the four of us if we weren't to far. But right know she had powerfully closed her mind.

- So? Asked Alice.

- So what? Said Sirius.

- I'm not talking to you! you dummy! I'm asking Deir if Siobhan said something.

- Said… What do you mean?

I glanced at a very confused Remus. I wanted to reassure him and explain but now was not the time. I had to help my friend.

* * *

Hey there. So what do you think? Any suggestions? 


End file.
